Once upon a time, there was a young girl who had grown disillusioned with her country. It was too religious, too conservative, too intolerant. I’ll move to France, she thought, and maybe one day my country will get better so I will be less ashamed of it.
So off to France she went, and there she will stay, perhaps permanently. However, she is still an American citizen and still has the right to vote in elections. She dutifully requested her absentee ballots, but always found it odd that her mother and not the clerk’s office sent them to her.
With the 2008 election fast approaching and the seething rage she felt at the thought of another Republican president, she became increasingly worried that her ballot had been lost or would not arrive on time. Her mom called the clerk’s office to see if there was a problem and discovered that the ballots were always being returned by the post office. Luckily, the girl was from a small town where most people knew everyone else, so when the ballots were returned, someone in the office knew to forward them on to her mother’s house. And then, of course, her mother sent them to France.
Even though the clerk’s office knew the girl lived in France, they never once thought to put more postage on the ballots, even after the first one was returned. Apparently she is the only registered voter from that township who no longer lives in the US. So if it weren’t for that small town connection, she may never have received her absentee ballots.
Thanks to her mom, once again, she finally received her ballot for the November 4th election!
At least her clerk’s office was kind enough to include this cute little pen/paperclip. It may not be a sticker, but it sure is more functional!
And looking at the ballot, she can finally see the names of the other people who are running for president but that no one has heard of or even cares about, except Ralph Nader (because we’re still bitter about him causing Gore to lose in 2000.)
So the ballot is now safely in her hands, and she can vote for her Democratic friends, though she is fully aware that her ballot most likely won’t even be counted, as most absentee ballots aren’t. USA 2008!