I keep spending too many hours online searching for a new place to live in the countryside and for that perfect PhD program that I can apply to in a few years. The problem is that I don’t know where we will be moving to this summer, so it’s impossible to actually find a new place. And I don’t know how long we will be in France, so there’s no point in looking at grad schools in North America when we may not go there soon. Plus it’s really hard to find a PhD program in French that will let me focus on pedagogy and linguistics instead of literature.
I’m still feeling frustrated and helpless and restless. I haven’t even bought our tickets to my sister’s wedding this summer because I don’t know where David will be working or how much vacation he will have (or even which airport we should fly out of.) Even though I only work 3 days a week, time is going by fast in some ways and slow in other ways. It’s already time for me to write a lettre de demande de renouvellement motivée so that I can renew my lectrice contract for the 2009-10 school year. Winter vacation starts in one week, during which all I plan on doing is finishing up the vocabulary lessons for the rest of the semester and working on my website, which is what I do every weekend anyway.
The lousy weather and the fact that our electric radiator just broke is putting me in a bad mood again. I know it’s still February, but winter is dragging on too long. I want spring more than anything right now. I want a new apartment. I want David to find a new job that doesn’t pay him a ridiculously low salary. I want to have some idea of what my life will be like in 2010 instead of constantly wondering and worrying.
Maybe I’m just jealous of friends who are moving to new apartments and starting PhD programs this fall. I want that. Right now.
P.S. What are people’s opinion of PhD programs in France? If I do manage to do an M2 next year, and we do stay in France longer than expected, I’d like to try doing my doctorate here in didactique des langues. I’ve always been told that American Master’s degrees are worth much more than French ones, but what about PhDs?